Sleeping Beauty and Depression

The night skies have been particularly heart-wrenching lately, from Sirius throwing off dazzling fuchsias, greens and reds, to the moon dripping it's light as though tears from amber eyes. There is something poignant about such light, maybe because it seems so tenuous, so measured, it feels precious to me, small beads of glass hope. So I sit tonight, with my headphones on, listening to music, music that is small in some ways, but that is as those little rips of light in the darkness...aching. 

As I listen I have fairy tales on the mind. I have been spending a lot of time lately thinking about the songs for an upcoming concert with Catherine Gell and Erin Dingle. The concert is titled 'Twisted Fables & Woven Worlds' and collaborative, with a main focus on music and spoken word, but also featuring art and dance. I have a particular love of multi-media performances, they seem to engage more of the senses to me, and provides a depth of understanding that goes beyond what music can provide on it's own. The theme excites me in a profound way: iconic objects from fairy tales, myths and fables re-imagined. Sometimes I think I never really grew up, because fairy tales still capture my imagination, still have the ability to make me catch my breath, to pull tears from my watery soul, to thrill me and give me that sigh of satisfaction that only a great story can do. So a concert based on fairy tales is filled with wonder for me. Beyond just the stories though I am in love with the idea of examining the iconic archetypal objects that seem to find their way into SO many stories, and not just fairy tales. These are objects that have graduated beyond simple things to almost become characters within the stories with layers of meaning and history attached to them: the rose, the dagger, the mirror, the crown, the apple, the doorway, the chalice, the loom. These objects capture me, subjugate, hold me enraptured and I am thrilled to be focusing an entire concert on them. I dream of such things, and find that these images are ever present in everything I write, in the way that I think, in the shape of my lyrics. To that end I already have a number of songs that work, but have written a number of songs as well, including the one below for this concert. The three of us ended up adding another archetype to the concert after much discussion and that is 'the shadow'. I wanted to examine this concept from a slightly unusual perspective, as simply the idea of an antagonist figure does not make my heart race nor bring sparkles to my eyes. So I have been thinking, and listening to some of the songs I have written, and pondering the stories I know and reading forums, and googling. ~laugh~ And finally I have come to something that sparks in me though I am unsure if I am going to use it or not. And that is the idea of the famous tale "sleeping beauty" as a metaphor for depression. Sleep, in particular as an allusion to withdrawal from the world, to feeling separate, alone and in a space unable to enjoy or really participate in the world. Being unengaged, and held by thorns of the mind's own making. Now that is a fairy tale re-imagined. I feel so animated by it, but am trying to hold back and see if it gels with all the other songs for the concert. I would love to hear other's thoughts on I am still tumbling it around in my head. 

In the mean time...I give you my chalice song...

Sulis lay your cup upon my lips
Let me drink the spring
Open doors to futures that you bring
In the fey mist

This is the eye of worlds
The veil beneath the sun
Seeking arms shall find their waiting peace
In the welling thrum

Fall through the gap where waters run so deep
Heal the wounded memories we keep
Aquae Sulis, calicem mundi
Sanctus es fons

Sing me bright one to a waking dream
Light the sacred fire
And pour the sky unto my wanting hands
Rouse to me desire

This is the eye of worlds
The veil beneath the sun
The gleam of hope that seeds itself
Within everyone

Fall through the gap and walk off the edge of time
Pull raveling threads from my twining mind
Aquae Sulis, calicem mundi
Laus tibia aquam

Let me gaze upon your endless face
Through the looking glass
Thread me through the fraying seams of night 
And resolve to me my past

This is the eye of worlds
The veil beneath the sun
Shrouded eyes shall speak the truth
When fear comes undone

Fall through the gap, a mirror still and clear
Let me reflect, the wholeness in your tears
Aqua Sulis, calicem mundi
Laudem te laudamus

Benedictus Sanctus Sulis

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